Our bro from Hipster Runoff returns to answer the question on everyone's mind. (I just copied that from Grantland. Is this fucking serious?)
|Hot (adj.) - Shown in image above|
Nay! I SAID NAY GOOD SIR. YOU SHOULD BE DISBARRED FOR THIS MOCKERY. A WOMAN MARRYING A WOMAN. NOT IN MY STATE! Oh Sasha is a man?
Look, I cannot be held to judge whether Sash is good enough for Maria. I'm way too biased. For instance, I have masturbated to Maria, and never Sasha, so therefore, there is a clear bias in my interests. Also, SHE SHOULD BE MINE. WHY NOT ACCEPT THE UTTER BEAUTY OF OUR LOVE MARIA. I WROTE A POEM FOR YOU.
You clear the net
The ball is a let
Do not shed a tear
Do not start to fret
Because I am here
to bring you some cheer
defining loves embrace
With a ring from De Beers
I shall sneak to your place
Don't spray me with mace
Please, Please let me pet
And then we'll embrace
DON'T YOU LOVE IT. YOU LOVE IT ENOUGH TO END THE ENGAGEMENT WITH SASHA RIGHT? RIGHT?!! OH GOD. I'D DROWN A BABY AND THEN GET ACQUITTED FOR YOU MARIA. DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?
P.S. I wrote this in blood so we can both have hepatitis C. TRUE LOVERS.