I've returned from a stint in the upper midwest (Minnesota) and am here to take your emails, that you sent to Bill Simmons, and that I am now stealing. WITHOUT HIS PERMISSION.
|"Good effort Peyton." *pouts*|
— Jono, St. Louis
Congrats asshat. You are just like all college students that are gay. Shaving chests. Doing tricks on the side to pay for that bikini wax. Venturing craigslist ads for sex, and offering a $12 reward for anyone willing. Sounds like a fun summer dude. That bitch teller was clearly all up on your nuts and wanted your scrawny dick inside her. Only a gay man doesn't take advantage of that.
Q: Which will last longer: The NFL lockout, or the time between Simmons mailbags?
— David C., NYC
Clearly the NFL lockout dick face for brains.
Q: Please do a mailbag before Sasha Vujacic marries Maria Sharapova and the world ends.
— John, Omaha, NE